“You’re a horrible person.” “Well, what’d you do that for, you moron?” “You’re broken and you need to be fixed.” “You’re lazy.” “Get it together, dumbass.” These are just a few of the things I’ve heard important people in my life say to themselves in the past two (yes, two!) days.
I don’t know if it’s a product of this blog, or therapy, or Tyler yelling at me for talking badly about his girlfriend (you know – me), or uncomfortable coaching, or what. But I find I am becoming increasingly aware of the horrible things people say to themselves. Stop and listen. It happens all the freaking time. Would we ever say those things to another human being? Probably not. So why do we think it’s okay to say them to ourselves?
Interestingly, I find that the people who don’t talk down to themselves are weirder than people who do. Perhaps the more amazing we believe we are, the more amazing we become? I don’t know.
What I do know is this:
Of course we could all make improvements. Of course we could all make better choices at times. And yes, I believe it’s our job as humans on this planet to constantly be improving. Even so. YOU ARE NOT HORRIBLE, OR A MORON, OR A DUMB ASS, OR LAZY. YOU ARE CERTAINLY NOT BROKEN. So, please. Be just as kind and compassionate to yourself as you would be to another human being. Or, at the very least, stop talking shit about yourself.
I know it’s hard. It’s ingrained in us for reasons I can’t begin to understand right now. But give it a shot. And If you can’t seem to make that change for you, then try it for us, the rest people around you who just want to see you be your amazingly weird self and love you for it.